WARNING
RANTING INFRONT. MAY CAUSE AUDIENCE TO FEEL BUTTHURT.
Hey guys. I had just been thinking eversince Valentines Day. We may love each other on earth but what happens in the after world then? LOL NO this was not was i was thinking. I was actually thinking between the lines of committing suicide and loneliness. Well, i did have a valentine. Let me describe this person first. He was a transferred kid that enrolled into our school. I used to like him. He was nice and everything. But the problem was, at that particular time, he was in love with my fellow best friend, so definitely i backed off. But of course him and me? We were practically texting each other from morning till night. And then suddenly, he tells me that he had confessed to my best friend. Who had also texted me at the same time saying that he had confess to her. Let'ss just say she really hated this guy. And well, i felt sorry for him. For getting rejected you know? Then i thought, right, i have a chance now don't i? And then a few days after he had been rejefcted by my best friend, he confessed to me. Now, this was just a total turn off. These were one of my pet peeves. Asking another girl out after you had just been rejected or just broke up with someone. This was also the main reason as to why i had hardly been in a relationship. So, yes, i did like him. But woah, calm down. Did you seriously like her or are you just playing with my heart and using me as a replacement? that's just fucked up man. Well, moving on, so he asked me the day before valentines of i had a valentines? I didn't particularly said no, but i knew he had wanted me to be his valentines badly since he had given me a few weeks to tell me my answer back then. So all i did was say," i volonteer as tribute." and that's all. The next day, i didn't expect anything for Valentines Day from him. It was the normal routine of being awkward and not talk at all. And giving me classmates chocolates and all that shit. And then he gave me a letter during our school self study time. So of course i didn't read until my CCA had ended. And when i read it i realized that, i made a big big big mistake of volounteering when i practically knew that it was out of sympathy. So now, he's acting like he's my boyfriend. Bro, personal place please. I was just your valentines not your girlfriend. And so, the day itself, after valentines, i saw my friends boyfriends come up to them and give them presents and hugs and kisses. I literally felt hurt at that moment. So we played a few games they had more PDA going on. And so after everything we decided that it was enough and that it was time for the girls to go back. The boys sent them home. That was when i realised, i am going to be alone seriously. So all i did was walk infront of them, far far away from them, eventhough we were all going to the same direction. And then i got to my house which was level 14 mind you. And it was close to my school. It was a windy day, i had my headphones and music on shuffle then this said song started. It's called, Take me away. So i was literally a very emotional person. Practically, Emo was my nickname back in my old school. A name that my ex boyfriend made for me but that's another story. So, i stared down from my floor to the walkway where majority of my school students were walking hand in hand with their boyfriends. I felt very much lonely that time. Very very very lonely. And suicidal. So with the song take me away on, i had thoughts like, maybe i should just die. Rather than rot in loneliness. Typical emo kids. Yeah let's just say i already had one of my leg propped up on the railings getting ready to put on the second and jump off when i realize, i might as well enjoy the loneliness instead of feeling the pain i would feel when committing suicide which would most probably overcome the feeling of loneliness in the pit of my stomach. Quickly, i pulled my leg off, ran into the house and locked myself in the room. I felt that, i should just sleep away my problems. Which practically means, sleeping away my loneliness. I slept till the next morning. So that was what had happened. I advice you guys to not follow what i had done.
That's all.
That's all.